While I could go on about my frustrations with certain elements of the plot, that isn't what I want to say today.
There's a quote in it I've been telling myself a lot lately. I'm not sure if it's actually in Jane Eyre, but I'm pretty sure it is. If it isn't, someone kindly direct me to the originator.
This is as well as I remember it:
I suppose I should add that all of the things I hate, crying is probably among the top ten. But as is the case with most transitions, they come with tears.
I have told myself for years that crying is a sign of weakness. A message drilled into my head from a bullied childhood. I tell myself ferociously that you do not cry in public. Be strong, I tell myself. Never let anyone see you cry. Hardly helped that matters of true frustration and emotion are usually attached to my tear ducts.
Lately though, I've been feeling a certain amount of kinship for Jane. I'm not sure why. Maybe because right now, I'm in a position similar to hers--alone in a strange place, not sure where to go. Not really closely attached to anyone yet and wary of strangers.
No one's almost run me over with a horse and I haven't run into any broodingly handsome, enigmatic landowners, and I'm okay with that. Honestly.
Right now, I feel like Jane and I could sit over a nice cup of tea and commiserate over this weird period of transition. How you're trying to connect, to get attached and sometimes you feel a thousand times removed from the whole situation. How crying helps sometimes. And you hate that it helps.
Jane cries quite a bit in the novel (or from what I remember) and she never lets this stop her. She picks herself up and carries on. And for that, I respect her enormously. When I read the book the whole way through this time, I think I'll like her even more for that.
Anyways. Over & Out,
Rachel
I love you, Rachel
ReplyDeleteI love Jane, but can’t really remember if the quote is from the book, it was years since I read it.
ReplyDeleteComing from a history of bullying and mental illness and so many transitions, my tears are a well known friend of mine, I tried the 'toughing up' approach but it back fired, now I know for sure that even when my tears fall, weakness is to let it stop me from achieving my goals.
Good post :)
I've always thought the same about crying, but like you, I've been learning it is just part of life and there is nothing wrong with shedding a few tears now and then. As the quote said, it is a sign you're human.
ReplyDeleteI hope things get easier for you soon!
Love Jane Eyre! ^_^ I've always been a crier, which has been a source of frustration and embarrassment at times (it prevents me from talking about deep emotions to people, and I can cry over the stupidest things. And age has definitely not solved the problem). I guess I've had to come to terms with it being a part of my personality. No shame there, and sometimes I just need a good cry!
ReplyDeleteThis is random, but I nominated you for the Sunshine Award on my blog (more details here: http://thebookofkels.blogspot.com/2014/08/sunshine-award.html). I hope you'll try it out but I completely understand if you don't have the time or don't want to mess with it. :)